My dad, fishing on Sunday at a lake near his house

We did have one problem though, and I wondered what you would have done about it. Some of us kids took my dad to a Brazilian steakhouse  in Downer’s Grove for dinner on Saturday to enjoy copious amounts of meat. To give you an idea of the costs, the food was $42 per plate. That gives you unlimited access to a big salad bar, 15 types of meats, and some side items. This was an “expensive” restaurant for our family, but we were all pretty excited to splurge on my dad. Drinks were not included with the price. 

As we ordered drinks from the waiter, we were considering getting a bottle of wine. While the waiter was standing there, I asked about three different bottles, all priced under $30. My dad wasn’t sure about the choices I picked (a pinot noir, a malbec, and a French red). He explained to the waiter that he wanted something sweet, and explained that he really loves sangria (which they had on the menu). The waiter said something along the lines of, “I have a sweet red wine that I think you will enjoy. It’s (insert name here).”  He was sort of difficult to understand through a thick accent.

I asked, “Is it your house wine?”

He said it was not, the house wine wasn’t sweet.

He never pointed it out his recommendation on the menu, but since he had seen the prices of the bottles I was considering and I asked about the house wine, I just assumed that his suggestion was on the same price point.

The wine came out and I thought it was good. We all had some. We actually left a little on the table because not everyone loved it.

Then the bill came: it was a $126 bottle of wine.

I was shocked.

But I didn’t ask about it because I thought it was my fault for not asking the price. After all, we drank the wine. It was nearly done by the time we got the bill. My family wanted me to ask about the price, but I was insistent that we didn’t because I didn’t want to cause a stink on a special occasion, and also because we consumed the wine, so there didn’t appear to be much the restaurant could do. So we just paid it and left.

Now, after a nice, relaxing weekend, I’m sitting here kicking myself. I should have made sure the waiter charged us for the right bottle. I shouldn’t have been embarrassed to question the bill. Had it been a special craft beer, we would have been very savvy consumers and known the price right away. Unfortunately, we’re not wine connoisseurs.  We had no idea whether that bottle retails for $20 or $200 (since it wasn’t one of the wines I normally buy). I should have made the waiter explain why he recommended such a higher-priced wine than a house wine with no warning. I feel totally fleeced by that guy.

In the future I will always ask for the price of a bottle of wine before I buy.  I’m thinking of calling the restaurant and asking them what the bottle was so I can make sure they charged us correctly.

So, readers, what would you have done differently in my situation?

The post Burned by the price of wine. What would you have done? appeared first on The Budgeting Babe.

Always a bridesmaid? Make sure you can afford it!

• Pay too much for housing and furnishings. My rent was too high for what I was earning when I first moved out of my parents’ home. I spent two years building up a savings cushion, only to see that cushion gradually disappear as I spent more than I made each month. Your rent or mortgage should be no more than 30 percent of your income. Above that, you’re really jeopardizing everything you’re working for. My current apartment isn’t perfect, but my rent hovers around 10 percent of my income and allows me to save big for a down payment. 
• Attend many weddings in one summer. After college, a lot of your friends will get married. Sometimes, you’ll have five weddings or more to attend in one summer. You can’t very well say no to your close friends and family, so you agree to attend. Then you purchase a dress (an expensive one, if you’re a bridesmaid), new shoes, and some nail polish (after all, you’re seeing all the same people at each wedding… you can’t wear the same dress twice!  You also purchase a shower gift. Then you spend money on a hotel room. Next is the actual wedding gift. By the time the summer’s over, you’ve spent like $500 to $1,000 extra each month that the weather is nice, and you have nothing to show for it except a feather light bank account.  Even when you employ frugal tactics like borrowing a dress and splitting a hotel room, multiple weddings in one summer are a budget buster unless you have some savings to cover them, or adjust your monthly budget in some other way.
• Take a vacation, and forget to plan for real costs.  It never fails: you save and save for your annual getaway, but you forget to account for meals, entertainment, souvenirs, or the crack in the rental car windshield, for example.  While on vacation, it’s easy to think, “Meh, what’s another $300? I’m only here once,” only to come back to a spending splurge hangover. Next time, check your budget from the month you took your last trip to make note of your spending patterns. Better yet, take your trip, then catalog your expenses when you return. Then you have a template for your next trip set up and ready to go.
• Injure yourself. MRIs, medications, appointments with specialists, follow-up physical therapy… none are cheap. And is it just me, or is insurance covering less and less of these expenses? The only way to protect yourself from blowing your budget is to have a rainy-day fund set up for something like this. And hope you heal quickly.
• Lose or break your cell phone. What’s that, you don’t have insurance? Your new iPhone will be $800, after rebate.  This wasn’t that much of an issue when we all had flip phones, and trust me, I lost a few of those. But now that our lives are run by smart phones, it’s much harder to deal with the subpar replacements offered by cell phone companies for less than $100. I’m not sure I could stand to be away from my phone 10 minutes, let alone wait until my next contract renewal. The best option? Don’t lose or break it in the first place!  But if it’s gone, keeping around your old smart phone for a few months or buying a used one off a friend might be a better idea than going without. If you don’t have that option, maybe try getting out for a few long walks while you save up for your new phone.

Ever blow your budget while trying to be good? I’d love to hear about it.

The post Five Ways to Blow Your Budget appeared first on The Budgeting Babe.

The Teva Wedge Sandals I bought for work. Super comfy. Waterproof. And expensive.

Here are a few random things I purchased last week.

• $20 to check my FICO score. I’ve been a little thrown off by the feedback from the credit bureaus that comes with my LifeLock subscription. So I bought my FICO score, which had much better feedback for me.
• $11 on a new very small wallet. It fits in pockets. This was a learning from my stolen wallet saga. I had previously carried wallets so big they had to be carried in a purse. Which meant 1) I was carrying a bunch of personal stuff I don’t need on me every day, and 2) I was carrying big purses, which leave you vulnerable to theft more than a wristlet or carrying your wallet in a zipped pocket on your body. I’ve been loving my wristlets, but my cash and cards inside them were always held together with a rubber band. Now they are a bit more official (and less likely to fall out).
• $100 on a cable modem so I could skip the $7 monthly rental fee from Comcast. (I also spent $35 on cords so I could watch my Netflix on the television vs. the small computer screen. Helloooo Arrested Development season 4!)
• I recently threw out or gave away eight pairs of shoes. I replaced two pairs of work shoes. One was a pair of black flats for a reasonable $39.

Not doing so bad yet, right?  Wait for it…

• A second pair of shoes; these were Teva brown leather wedge sandals. And they were $84. I bought them because I learned long ago that cheap stiletto heels are a no-go for me. I need to buy shoes with some support, especially when it comes to heels. But now that I have them, I think I probably could have done without them. I got kind of wrapped up in the moment at DSW. 
• $77 at Ulta (beauty supplies). This included a $23 bottle of conditioner which will last me six months or more, new eye shadow (unfortunately Bare Essentials is not cheap), two new shades of nail polish, and a new top coat. I always hate spending money on beauty supplies. And I hate that I buy expensive brands. But they really are so much better than the cheap stuff. And, at least I didn’t pay for a manicure!

One of the nail polishes I bought. Happened to be the same color as my water bottle. (Clearly, this is a DIY manicure.)

Then there’s also the usual stuff: rent, groceries, pet food.

I guess those bottom two bullet points aren’t that bad. I didn’t go over my clothing and shoes budget during the month of May, and my entertainment and travel spending was nada (we cancelled a planned trip at the last minute). I did a really good job saving during the previous few weeks, and most of my bigger expenses were pre-planned (marathon training program, for instance).

Wow, it’s crazy how expenses that used to be nothing for me suddenly gnaw at me as overspending. I’m trying really hard to be frugal and less focused on consumerism, so when I give into unnecessary wants vs. planned purchases or needs, I feel like I’ve cheated on me. Maybe I shouldn’t be so hard on myself.

The post A week of spending appeared first on The Budgeting Babe.

This morning, a student group came in to talk with me about communications careers and social media. It got me thinking about advice I would offer to the graduating class of 2013. I can go on for hours about careers in communications, but instead, here, I’ll focus on financial advice for your future.

• Don’t spend what you don’t have. Plain and simple. Step one to being independent is setting up a budget and sticking to it. Sounds simple, but you’d be amazed at how often adults fail at this. Buying on credit is spending what you don’t have. Learn to live on what you earn, no matter how little. Learn how to say no. And learn to be comfortable living within your means.
• Save, save, save. Adopt a frugal lifestyle, no matter how much you earn. Sock money away before you ever see it with automatic deposits. Invest in a retirement fund. Yes, in your 20′s. It’s important to develop good saving and spending habits at this stage in the game, rather than be someone else’s mess later on in life.  
• Blaze your own trail. I have been living in an apartment since 2003, paying rent. This makes my family legitimately angry. A lot of my loved ones feel very strongly that home ownership is important. I feel that saving up for a down payment is important. I have a strong retirement fund and a lot of cash savings. I feel good about this decision.// … I didn’t drive until age 28, and I didn’t buy a car until age 31. People thought this was shocking. Some loved ones actually got upset that I would “put myself in danger” on public transportation. I made due just fine.// … And while we’re on expenses, man friend and I are saving up for a wedding, eventually. Which means I’m 33 and not married, with no kids. And I am training for a marathon, travel often, and love my job. And I’m doing great.// …  Sometimes, people’s best financial advice, while heartfelt and well-meaning, isn’t what is right for you. Do your research, and believe in your own brain.
• Determine what you value, and make it your true North. In college, I vividly remember doing an exercise where we had to rank our top priorities in life. At the time, mine went something like: 1) Education, 2) Family, 3) Friends. It was my signal that whatever happened, my education and family came above anything else. Now, many years later, the same exercise would have  a different, but not unfamiliar, outcome. Nowhere in there would you find material goods, a big house, a fat salary, or climbing the corporate ladder. Today, I value my loved ones, I treasure new life experiences, and I value my health. The way I spend my time directly correlates to those. It’s easy balancing your budget when it corresponds nicely with your values. 
• Treat others how you want to be treated. In business, and in life, this is of the utmost importance. Don’t cheat, steal, lie, or step on others to get to the top. Be kind. Invest honestly. Live a life that’s worth living, and help raise others up, not drag them down.

Congratulations to the class of 2013. You face a long road ahead that will no doubt be filled with challenges, and no road map or course catalog offers a guaranteed path to get you to a place of happiness and financial security. But if you make wise choices, commit to doing good, and stay true to yourself, you’ll be closer than you think.

Here are a few other Budgeting Babe posts college graduates might be interested in.

• 2012:  Be the heroine
• 2012:  How not to handle your student loans
• 2008:  The class of ’08 scrambles to find work

The post Advice for College Graduates appeared first on The Budgeting Babe.

“The Unwind,” a dance move created by my mom.

Though she can cut a rug when the occasion calls for it, Mother’s Day is  typically a low-key event for my family. We usually just hang out at my parents’ house; my dad cooks, my the rest of us watch movies and play sports outside. 

This year, instead, my dad left for a fishing trip Sunday morning, and we children decided to take my mom to the zoo to enjoy the weather and allow her to spend time with her one and only grandson. So on a blustery morning that felt more like early April in Chicago, nine of us trooped to Brookfield Zoo in the western suburbs to take in the monkeys, lions, and bears. We spent a few hours there until my brother, his wife, and their baby split, and then the remaining six of us went for coffee followed by dinner and drinks. My mom enjoyed herself (maybe not at the level of intensity in the above photo), so I’ll count the day as a success.

Here’s how the spending went:

1. Gifts. I bought her a yellow flower plant, mums, for $10, a box of cookies for $4, and a card for $4. I included a future dinner and a movie in the card, so let’s count that as an additional $100. Total: $118.
2. Zoo day. We are zoo members, so no fee for parking or entry. We lunched at one of the zoo cafeterias, and I put lunch for 6 on my charge card for ~$70. I got money back from most of my siblings, but I’m still collecting. My lunch alone was probably around $12 for a salad, juice, water, cookie, and chips. My eyes were too big for my stomach; I only ate the salad, 1/2 cookie, and drank the water. I gave the rest away.
3. Coffee. I’m not sure who paid for my coffee at Starbucks after the zoo. There was a lot of awkward throwing of money at each other. Hilariously, I think the $20 my mom tried to pay ended up back in her pocket, and there’s a good possibility the $8 I tried to spend ended up stuffed somewhere in the back seat of my car.
4. Dinner. We had a lovely three-course dinner for six at our local pub for ~$215 (including tip). $36 per person isn’t bad, when you factor in that we all had two drinks each and my mom got crab legs. I paid for most of this meal because I was treating my mom and I owed my brother and his g/f a meal. So I paid$135 of that total.  Again, there was a lot of awkward “YOU BETTER LET ME PAY FOR THIS” type of talk by everyone at the table. My brothers having full-time jobs is a new thing so none of us really are used to them having cash for outings like this. I will let them treat me next time, for sure.

Looking at the rundown above, Mother’s Day was pretty expensive. Especially when you consider that we took manfriend’s mom out for dinner the night before with his family.  Since we don’t do this every year, I’m OK with this spending level. After all, if you can’t give your mom a nice holiday when you work full-time, what’s the point?  There are days to be frugal and days to splurge a little, and Mother’s Day is definitely a splurge day.

I went grocery shopping later that night and spent around $150, so I will have to be very good with my cash flow this week. It won’t be difficult; we don’t have any events to attend (phew!) and our house is a mess so we’ll spend this week cleaning and hopefully relaxing a bit when I’m not training for upcoming races.

How did your Mother’s Day go?

The post Mother’s Day Spending Recap appeared first on The Budgeting Babe.

On to budgeting. Here’s a little tip to get you through the week: If you feel like your financial future is one big mess, focus on things you can control now vs. those you can’t.

For instance, in 2009 I was spending a lot of time freaking out over how my parents would afford health care during retirement and what the future might (or might not) hold for me. But those are things I can’t control, and worrying about what might or might not happen in the future is no way to enjoy all the wonderful things that are happening around me right now — or to ensure my stability. Thinking about a million different possibilities that may happen 10 years from now is enough to leave anyone dizzy with doubt about the “right” investments, paralyzed and overwhelmed by all the options.  

Without the benefit of hindsight, I’m too young to tell anyone what the best investment choices might be to secure your future. But my hump day tip is to focus on the easy choices you can make today to put you in control of your financial future when those tough decisions come due. For instance, set up an automatic payment system that sounds reasonable (say, $25 a month) for your savings account instead of haphazardly setting aside money when you feel like you can. Commit to paying your credit card bills on time and pay down that debt. Increase the percentage you invest in your retirement account. Set up a meeting with a financial planner. Start writing down your personal goals and set up a plan to make them happen.

You’ll never have control of the future. But making smart choices today can give you peace of mind and alleviate some of the anxiety associated with the unknown. Focus on decisions you can make today, then put future doubts out of your mind with a long walk or some other physical activity. Live in the present, not in distant future!

The post Quick Budgeting Tip No. 1 appeared first on The Budgeting Babe.

Even on sick days, finances are still top of mind. Credit cards, cable, loans, and phone bills don’t stop coming, no matter how much I want to bury my head in a pillow. Since I only get paid once per month, I’ve lined up all my bills to be paid the week after my check is deposited. That way, I never have trouble making payments and always know where my bank account stands through the course of the month.

It’s nice not worrying about whether I have funds in my checking to cover payments at the end of the month. I pay everything when my accounts are healthiest, set aside savings for the month, and the rest is disposable income. Not only do I pay myself first, I also pay all my bills first, which is really good for peace of mind.

If you have trouble paying bills on time, or it seems like every month you’re having difficulty making payments due to low checking balances, it’s worth looking into moving your payment due dates closer to the date(s) you get paid. Most companies are very amenable to changing due dates.

Now that I’ve paid all my monthly bills, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go make more tea and have a nap.

The post Bill-paying day appeared first on The Budgeting Babe.

Reflections on Money
Originally posted April 29, 2006

Over the past 18 months since I started this blog, and incidentally, since I seriously committed to my finances, I’ve learned a few things about spending and saving.

Don’t get me wrong – I’m the first to admit that I’m no expert in money management. And I know my financial journey in still on the first leg of the trip. There are decades, years, lifetimes of financial lessons I have yet to learn. However, here are some lessons I’ve learned along the way:

Read more

The post An oldie but goodie appeared first on The Budgeting Babe.

But while some of my favorite local running and biking routes were underwater, I’m relieved to say that my apartment was not. (Many of my friends and co-workers were not so lucky.)  Thankfully, I could take the terrible weather in stride. In all, my financial week was fairly uneventful and pretty well disciplined. Here’s the breakdown:

Sunday
Had lunch at my parents’ house; we got Portillo’s and my awesome Dad picked up the tab. (Thanks!) I ordered a “cup of beef”  which sounds hilarious and happens to be gluten-free, then added it to some Udi’s bread my mom keeps at her place for me. Gluten-free eating isn’t all tasteless… it isn’t all healthy either though.

After, I came home and rode my bike around my flood-ravaged suburb. I’m trying to be more observant in my life, so as I rode, I made mental notes of all the damaged property out on the streets and took photos and video of floodwater. This was the first time this year the weather was nice enough to ride outside.

I can’t recall spending anything on Sunday, so I’ll call it a spend free day. And a good one at that.

Monday
After the local Run for Boston, I hit the grocery store to stock up for the week: $120.
I think I might have bought some snacks at work too. I know that I was low on supplies at home. Maybe $3?

Tuesday
Fully stocked groceries! So no need to spend on food at the office.
Had a doctor’s appointment today. I didn’t have a co-pay due at my visit, but I’m sure I’ll have to pay for some blood tests later.

Renewed my annual BeginnerTriathlete subscription for $50. This site is where I track all my fitness progress. I’ve been a member since maybe 2008? There was a point in my life, years ago, where I was contemplating Weight Watchers. Instead I decided to do triathlons and committ to fitness. Not only does this site have training plans, it also has mentoring, calorie counters, and route maps. I love it. So I am always happy to renew. It’s going to keep me sane through my marathon training.

Wednesday
Renewed my blog domains with GoDaddy for $69. I had hoped eventually I’d have advertisers to cover this sort of cost, but I don’t have the time to put into doing that, so I just pay for it myself. Eventually, perhaps, it will happen. For now I will just focus on my writing.

Thursday
No spending!

Friday
I didn’t quite pack a complete lunch today, so I picked up a few snacks at work for $3.05. I have to re-evaluate my lunches in light of all the running I’m doing. More miles = more hungry.

In addition, I took ManFriend out for dinner tonight since his birthday is this weekend. He scored tickets to Three Floyd’s Dark Lord Day Festival (a hot item in world of craft beer) on Saturday, so we did dinner tonight instead. We had delicious sushi at a local place for about $100 including tip.

So there you have it, around $345 in expenses for the week so far. Slightly more than expected because two of my online subscriptions ran out; they happen to be my ONLY two online subscriptions.

Notice what’s not on this list? Bar tabs. Lunches out. Gas. Random drugstore stuff like magazines and beauty supplies. “Stuff” in general. My biggest expense is food; I’m happy to spend my earnings on healthy everyday habits and infrequent special occasion splurges.

How did your week in spending go? I hope you all stayed dry and avoided the flood waters.

The post How I spent the week appeared first on The Budgeting Babe.

An imposter drained my bank accounts

By late December 2012, my holiday countdown had begun. Ten minutes before the office Christmas party, my thoughts turned to a seemingly endless list of festive preparations I had yet to finish before a string of family gatherings kicked off: gifts to buy, cookies to bake, cards to deliver…

… BUZZ …

My phone interrupted my thoughts with a text message: “You have $0.30 remaining in your bank account.”

“That’s not right,” I thought.

Sitting at my desk, I checked my online bank account.

$0.30

…What? 

I quickly discovered two large withdrawals in my transaction list. Surely a mistake had been made. I called the bank.

It was not a mistake.  Not only was my checking account drained, two more large withdrawals had been taken from my savings account. In total, $4,000 was gone from my account little more than 24 hours.

The bank never suspected identity theft.  The text I received was my own alert designed to send a message if my checking account ever got low.

As the magnitude of the situation unfolded, first I cried. (How would I buy my family Christmas presents with no money!?) Then I screamed at the bank. (How could this happen!?)  Then, shaking, I collected my thoughts and demanded answers. At some point, a co-worker brought me pizza from the holiday party, and I wiped away my tears of rage.  Then, I took a personal day and spent the next 24 trying to right everything. Then, the next four weeks trying to get my accounts back to normal.

Now, months later, I have a complete picture of what happened.  I have a new bank. And while I’m still vulnerable to these same thieves, I can at least share a few of the key points.

How it happened

When my wallet was stolen in November, I called my large national bank twice to report the incident.  The first time I called, the night of the wallet theft, the representative said I didn’t need to do anything more, she would cancel my bank card and send me a new one. I thought it was odd that I she didn’t advise me to close the account.

I called two days later to ask, “What happens if someone walks into a branch with my driver’s license and tries to withdraw cash?”

The representative said, “Don’t worry ma’am, that won’t happen, we are a very secure bank.”

Neither woman I spoke to, apparently, set the proper flags on my accounts.

Three weeks later, a woman my height, my weight, with matching hair color, dressed in a jacket similar to mine on the night my wallet was stolen, walked into four different bank branches without my bank account number, social security number, or a functioning ATM card and rapidly removed $4,000 from my accounts. No flags went off at any bank branch.

At branch number five, a cashier recognized that the imposter wasn’t a perfect match for my ID and thought she was behaving oddly. The fake ran off in a hurry, and left my driver’s license behind.  We later saw it was a dummy wallet with fake credit cards; not my wallet and not my cards. I never got those back, but they were all cancelled anyway.

The wallet she left behind was a textured or beaded material, one that would make it nearly impossible to get prints. My dad, a retired cop, said, “It’s not her first time at the rodeo.”

My response

In November, I had filed a police report and put flags on my credit report, so when this new theft showed up, I just amended my police report and made a note to the credit bureaus. I informed my other financial institutions in writing that I had no plans to remove any large amounts any time soon.

My big national bank advised me to get a new bank, so I did. This was a major pain because I only had 48 hours before my once-monthly work check posted. At that point, the imposter was still on the loose with my driver’s license, so I didn’t want my cash going to that account. Work would not write me a check.  Once I rushed to transfer the deposit, I had no access to my paycheck, and I had zero dollars in my account for two weeks.

After the old bank’s investigation closed, it reimbursed me for my losses and cashed me out. Easy. Then, for two weeks after that, they charged me a bunch of fees for having “insufficient funds” in my account. I have never met with so many people face to face to explain away bogus charges. Thank goodness I’m financially savvy, and I keep records and detailed notes of every conversation regarding my case. No one else but me was on top of it.

Finally, I later enlisted an intense credit monitoring service in case anyone tries to use the information from my wallet to open up new lines of credit. 

Back to blogging

One other action I immediately took while the imposter was on the loose: I took my blog down for personal security reasons. It meant I would lose readers, especially since it was long term, but it was for my personal safety and security. I also took time to scrub my site of some references, which meant reviewing more than 500 posts. That took even more time than dealing with my banks, but now I’ve got everything safe for public consumption again.

Thanks to everyone who reads this post and puts me back in their feeds and blogrolls. I could have never imagined I’d go through something like this, but I’m enormously glad I’ve been chronicling my finances for the past nine years. It helped me remain calm after the initial shock, locate the resources I needed in a time of crisis, and prepare me to hold many confident conversations with financial types involved in a case I took into my own hands.

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